Ned: Homer, I’ve got a fozzie of a bear of a problem. Y’ know, Maude and her mother were visiting Tyre and Sidon, the twin cities of the Holy Land. They must’ve kneeled in the wrong place and prayed to the wring God because, well, they’re being held prisoner by militants of some sort.

Homer: Militants, huh? Well, if I were you, I’d kick their asses.

Ned: Well, and hoodily-doodle, the embassy says it’s just a routine hostage-taking, but I have to drive to Capital City, fill out some forms to get ‘em out. Could you possibly watch the kids tonight.

Homer: Uh, gee, I’d really love to want to help you Flanders, but…uh…Marge was taken prisoner in the…uh…Holy Land…and…